Kimberly Peil

My Mixer Says It All

In Uncategorized on January 26, 2011 at 7:51 pm

Six years ago Hunter and I were sitting in a premarital counseling session.  We were one of five couples in this group session.  The counselor went around and asked each spouse to say what they wanted and hoped for their spouse, as far as future goals and aspirations.  Hunter was very sweet and talked about how he hoped that I would have a flourishing career as an Interior Designer.  I broke down and started crying… in front of everyone.  His intentions were good, but all I wanted was to be a stay at home mom.  And it still took several years before I think he really, truly understood that this was ALL I wanted to do for a “career.”  I meant it.  Now, I am not writing this to bash on Hunter.  I did a LOT of growing and learning those first 4 1/2 years of childless marriage as well.  I got a lot of things wrong.  Stay with me, this is going somewhere.

Today I was in my tiny kitchen cooking and I glanced at my sweet new mixer that Hunter got me for Christmas.  For those of you who don’t have a large kitchen (or counter space for a full-size KitchenAid), this is the next best thing.  I seriously love it!

It made me think of a time when I was so ungrateful for all that I had.  I hated my small kitchen.  It was so small that when you opened the refrigerator door, it hit the counter on the other side.  I hated our 400 sq. ft. apartment that we had to live in for three years.  I hated pretending like I cared about what I was doing, when all I wanted to do was be a mom.  While our conditions have improved greatly, we are nowhere near where I thought we would be 5 1/2 years into our marriage… as far as possessions go.  But there has been an amazing shift of heart over the past few years.

For me, it really did start with being pregnant.  While I HATED being pregnant, I was still very grateful that I was finally working towards my dream.  That sounds kind of funny, I know.  Hunter was on board and excited about having a baby.  This was a big deal, because for almost four years I wasn’t even allowed to discuss potential names for our future children.  And then finally getting to be a SAHM gave me a complete attitude adjustment.  I still have a small kitchen.  We are still renting an apartment.  Our cars are a 2001 Camry and a 1996 Acura.  I get a pedicure once a year, maybe.  And my big splurge is getting my hair done every 3-4 months.  And while I hope that someday we have nicer things, I am not bothered by our situation today.  I suppose if I worked we would have more things.  Hunter and I made the decision to let me stay home with Ella.  He is so gracious to let me do so.  It is a big sacrifice on both of our parts.  He really did hear me six years ago in that counseling session… even if it did take a while to finally sink in.

So right now Hunter, Ella and I have a lot of really tough challenges going on in our lives.  It has been stressful, but I am not angry.  I find myself being thankful.  Hunter is an amazing husband, and Ella is a wonderful little girl.  So when I think of those blessings, I can’t help but smile when I am standing in my tiny kitchen, staring at my new mixer. 🙂

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  1. Love this Kim!! Happy to read this, glad that I am helping you to find your grateful in the small things too!

  2. I LOVE this post. I could probably write a very similar story. I am one of those types of employees that will try my hardest, if it is a job that I love. I have had jobs in the past when I have taken sick days and I wasn’t even sick. I just didn’t want to be there. I would never hire me! But being a mom is not that kind of job for me. I love going to work every day and it is something that I have always dreamed about as well.
    P.S.
    I got a KitchenAid for Mother’s Day the first year we were married. To some wives this would be an insult, but it was something I had been wanting and my husband heard me. Prior to having children, I would have thought receiving an appliance for a “Mother’s Day Thank You” would be a huge slap in the face. I couldn’t have been more excited though. http://mikeandmindyroth.blogspot.com/2009/05/mothers-day-weekend.html

  3. I love this post, Kim and can completely relate (being a SAHM and wife to a teacher). The stuff isn’t what is important, it’s relationships. We have the best/most rewarding/hardest job in the entire world!

  4. Gee, now I feel like a total ass for exchanging my mixer for a NYE outfit. : )

    No, but seriously this is a sweet post and I get the point you are making. I think we need to catch you soon.

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